SECOND SEM
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Watch out for Tanghalang Ateneo’s 33rd Season-ender, Fireflies! The shows are on February! :)
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[video]
My second year first semester theme. It fits, really. I’m forced to accept things I cannot change, and sincerely hope and pray that “everything’s going to be okay.” One after another, circumstances stick to me like bees to their honey, stalkers to their prey, and sluts to their paying customers, biting me as if I’m the cookie of Cookie Monster. I’ve been eaten alive, inside and out. And honestly, I don’t know what to feel anymore. It was decision after decision, consequences after another. I’m fucking tired! If there’s one lesson I learned the hard way, it was this: “There are no right or wrong decisions anymore. What makes it so hard to make a decision is to accept the consequences and guilt that comes with it. The ever so popular “What ifs?”
I regret not waking up to enlist my subjects. (given that I’m blessed in having a first batch random number)
I regret having to be in a History class, which in the beginning I thought was easy-shmeazy, REQUIRED me to read x numbers of readings as if it was my major. Sincerely and with all honesty, ma’am? WHAT THE FUCK.
I regret underestimating Fil14. It sucks that you have to answer quizzes whose questions are literally comes from anything under the sun JUST BECAUSE my well renowned professor wants to.
I regret still being in my course even if my heart’s leaning for another. And now, I doubt if they’ll give me the chance to shift.
I regret accepting The Scholarship and going through all the ups and downs of what seems to me as an additional burden instead of a stress reliever.
I regret not fighting, risking for you.
I regret taking those damn risks.
And I ask myself, what now? What do I want and/or need to do? I look at my bookmark I made in my prayer session during NSTP, and I was replenished. I quote..
“I am called to a dream greater than myself. And I shall dream nothing less.”
1. “Kung hindi mo mahal ang isang tao, wag ka nang magpakita ng motibo para mahalin ka nya..”
2. “Huwag mong bitawan ang bagay na hindi mo kayang makitang hawak ng iba.”
3. “Huwag mong hawakan kung alam mong bibitawan mo lang.”
4. “Huwag na huwag ka hahawak kapag alam mong may hawak ka na.”
5. “Parang elevator lang yan eh, bakit mo pagsisiksikan ung sarili mo kung walang pwesto para sayo. Eh meron naman hagdan, ayaw mo lang pansinin.”
6. “Kung maghihintay ka nang lalandi sayo, walang mangyayari sa buhay mo.. Dapat lumandi ka din.”
7. “Pag may mahal ka at ayaw sayo, hayaan mo. Malay mo sa mga susunod na araw ayaw mo na din sa kanya, naunahan ka lang.”
8. “Hiwalayan na kung di ka na masaya. Walang gamot sa tanga kundi pagkukusa.”
9. “Pag hindi ka mahal ng mahal mo wag ka magreklamo. Kasi may mga tao rin na di mo mahal pero mahal ka.. Kaya quits lang.” 10. “Kung dalawa ang mahal mo, piliin mo yung pangalawa. Kasi hindi ka naman magmamahal ng iba kung mahal mo talaga yung una.”
11. “Hindi porke’t madalas mong ka-chat, kausap sa telepono, kasama sa mga lakad o ka-text ng wantusawa eh may gusto sayo at magkakatuluyan kayo. Meron lang talagang mga taong sadyang friendly, sweet, flirt, malandi, pa-fall o paasa.”
12. “Huwag magmadali sa babae o lalaki. Tatlo, lima, sampung taon, mag-iiba ang pamantayan mo at maiisip mong hindi pala tamang pumili ng kapareha dahil lang maganda o nakakalibog ito. Totong mas mahalaga ang kalooban ng tao higit sa anuman. Sa paglipas ng panahon, maging ang mga crush ng bayan nagmumukha ding pandesal, maniwala ka.”
13. “Minsan kahit ikaw ang nakaschedule, kailangan mo pa rin maghintay, kasi hindi ikaw ang priority.”
14. “Mahirap pumapel sa buhay ng tao. Lalo na kung hindi ikaw yung bida sa script na pinili nya.”
15. “Alam mo ba kung gaano kalayo ang pagitan ng dalawang tao pag nagtalikuran na sila? Kailangan mong libutin ang buong mundo para lang makaharap ulit ang taong tinalikuran mo.”
16. “Mas mabuting mabigo sa paggawa ng isang bagay kesa magtagumpay sa paggawa ng wala”
17. “Hindi lahat ng kaya mong intindihin ay katotohan, at hindi lahat ng hindi mo kayang intindihin ay kasinungalingan”
18. “Kung nagmahal ka ng taong di dapat at nasaktan ka, wag mong sisihin ang puso mo. Tumitibok lng yan para mag-supply ng dugo sa katawan mo. Ngayon, kung magaling ka sa anatomy at ang sisisihin mo naman ay ang hypothalamus mo na kumokontrol ng emotions mo, mali ka pa rin! Bakit? Utang na loob! Wag mong isisi sa body organs mo ang mga sama ng loob mo sa buhay! Tandaan mo: magiging masaya ka lang kung matututo kang tanggapin na hindi ang puso, utak, atay o bituka mo ang may kasalanan sa lahat ng nangyari sayo, kundi IKAW mismo!”
19. “Pakawalan mo yung mga bagay na nakakasakit sa iyo kahit na pinasasaya ka nito. Wag mong hintayin ang araw na sakit na lang ang nararamdaman mo at iniwan ka na ng kasiyahan mo.”
20. “Gamitin ang puso para alagaan ang mga taong malalapit sa iyo. Gamitin ang utak para alagaan ang sarili mo.”
21. “Ang pag-ibig parang imburnal…nakakatakot mahulog…at kapag nahulog ka, it’s either by accident or talagang tanga ka..”ITO YUN EH.
made my night!
everythangiloveleaves asked: Since you are following me, if you haven't already seen my photography.
Here is the link to it:
www.flickr.com/photos/jaredfphotography
Thank you so much for taking the time to view it.
right!
joshradnorarchive asked: sama mo, banjo. :-(
HAHAHA kk
it wasn’t for a bad reason, haha.